#it would be nice to all show some support!! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dallacuna · 2 days ago

Text

Lost in Translation: ALNST "Karma"

As a bicultural, bilingually native Korean/English speaker, I wanted to offer some insights into some of the nuances that the official translation sacrificed in localizing to English. I'll go line by line in the order they appear in the video, monologues and all.

Monologue 1

1: ❗Stop pretending to be so righteous.❗

"위선 떨지마." hypocrisy, don't [show it off]

The Korean here reads, "위선 떨지마." The word "위선" (wiseon) quite literally, dictionary-definition, means "hypocrisy." However, in colloquial usage, the full line often means 'stop trying to pretend you're a good person' or 'stop pretending you're nice.'

Personally, I believe the word "righteous" implies a justice-oriented evaluation that is absent in the Korean. I think if the official wanted to retain accuracy, I feel it would have been more accurate as:

<Stop pretending to be so virtuous>.

However, since that's a little clunky, I think the most appropriate localization would instead have been: <Don't pretend to be so good>.

(For visibility, I will color what I consider the most accurate translation in purple. Crucial mistranslations will be marked by an ❗emoji. These translations are, of course, biased by my interpretations and preferences, but I will try to be as objective + have had my opinions peer-reviewed by a friend who is also bilingual/bicultural and translates professionally.)

2 & 3: Neither you nor I deserve to be saved.

"너나 나나 구원받을 자격 없어" you or me, [we] don't have the right to be saved

Technically correct, and I don't think anyone would fault this translation. However, if we translate the Korean literally, the line reads, 'Whether it's you or me, [we] don't deserve to be saved.'

The end result of this is that in Korean, in the first line, we don't know whether what follows is negative or positive until we hear it. To better convey that effect, I think the structure would benefit as:

Song Pt. 1

4: Me, together with you

그대와 함께인 나 with you, together, the me

If translated literally, the Korean "그대와 함께인 나" reads, 'The me who is together with you,' with the 'together with you' modifying the subject of the sentence, 'me.'

Of course, that sounds more awkward in English than the Korean, so I understand why it might have been localized differently. However, I still think there's something somewhat poetic about it.

Another nuance is that the "you" being used in Korean here is "그대" (geudae) which is an intentionally formal, literary way of referring to someone, in contrast to the more informal/casual "너" (neo, rhymes with 'huh?'), which Till uses in "Mi Vida Loca."

5: ❗We head to the distant star below❗

비로소 지하의 별로 우리 at last, to the underground's star, we

I've seen this line going around with some confusion, and that is because the English translation is deeply misleading. The Korean used here reads, "비로소 지하의 별로 우리," which translates literally to, 'At last, to the star underground, [we/us].'

"Underground" here is literal, with the Chinese characters for it being 地 'ground,' and 下 'under/below.' Most commonly, we use the word to indicate a basement. However, we also use it frequently in the phrase "지하 세계" jiha segae, meaning 'the world underground'—the underworld, often connotated with the death.

Supporting this reading is the fact that in Korean, '별' byeol has a meaning other than 'star.' Colloquially, Korean uses the word to refer to any celestial bodies aside from the sun, moon, and man-made satellites—including planets.

<We at last, to the star/planet underground> Mizi sings. <We at last, to the afterlife> she means (at least to my understanding!)

6: To eternity, or perhaps even beyond

영원 어쩌면 그 너머까지 eternity, perhaps over/beyond that

This is an accurate translation of "영원 어쩌면 그 너머까지." However, if I were to be nitpicky, the Korean uses the word "그," which is referential back to 'eternity.' Although this is due to a function of Korean grammar, I think it would work poetically in English.

Additionally, even though the official translation smoothly connects the sentence as as "[…] to eternity, or […]" the actual Korean reads quite disjointed. The grammar of the lines in the verse so far is unconventional, with the ideas not quite flowing, meaning that a closer translation may be better rendered:

<Eternity—perhaps even beyond that>

7: You and me, or "we"

당신과 나, 또 우리 you and me, [and/again] [we/us]

"당신과 나, 또 우리" literally translates to, 'You and me, [and/again] [we/us]' which lends itself to some ambiguity as to how it can be translated into English. However, considering the overarching themes of the song, I personally feel it may be best rendered as:

However, a lesser known fact of Korean is that one of our words for 'pen to keep animals' or 'cage' is a homonym for 'we/us,' both oori. This is simply a result of the Korean language not necessarily an intentional poetic choice, but the end result is the same that another slightly forced but possible reading is, <You and me, another cage>.

Lines 8-11 are the same as 4-7.

12: When twilight falls and gently embraces us

어스름 내려와 우릴 감싸 안으면 twilight comes down [and] envelop-hugs us

"어스름 내려와 우릴 감싸 안으면"—my initial translation of this line was nearly identical to the official, but upon discussion with my friend and further thought, there are three points of divergence.

Firstly, something lost in translation is that the word used for "twilight" (eoseureum) is also translated as 'dusk' and used similarly as an adjective to mean 'dusky'—the word moreso means this sort of hazy half-light darkness, and technically it can also be used to describe any such environment, whether it be dawn or dusk or a dimly lit room. However, because this 'twilight' is described as 'falling,' this to me moreso implies dusk than dawn, as darkness descends when it is bright, not when it is already dark.

I believe identifying this distinction is significant, as in English, the time of day we call 'dusk' is often considered the opposite of 'dawn,' with dawn signifying beginnings and dusk signifying ends—this feels important to the themes of the song.

Secondly, in the official translation, the verb "falls" takes some poetic license. The Korean word being used, "내려와" (naeryeowa), more accurately translates to 'comes down' or 'descends.' Something falling can give the impression of something accidental and or forceful—this hazy dusk arrives neutrally, but it envelopes you.

Speaking of the embrace, the Korean "감싸 안으면" (gamssa an-eumyeon) more accurately translates to, 'to envelop in/wrap into an embrace,' but poetically I agree that "gently embraces" isn't a bad choice, though I do wonder if it feels 'weaker.'

Lastly, the official translation chooses to use "when," giving the line a sense of inevitability, to me, the Korean grammar here more so implies a conditional, making a closer translation as follows:

13: Our hearts burst into joyful bloom

당신과 내 심장 흐드러지게 웃지 yours and my heart, to make it burst into bloom, [something: the twilight/you/me/us, etc.] laughs

"당신과 내 심장 흐드러지게 웃지" is a very, very difficult line to translate. I can see how the official chose this localization, but there are many nuances here that are almost impossible to translate.

Firstly, in Korean, sometimes complete sentences drop pronouns because the speaker is implied by the language. In this case, the most natural speaker to assume is that the narrator and the person they are speaking to are the ones who laugh—'you' and 'me.' However, because there is no explicit confirmation, it is possible to read it as other ways.

The word 흐드러지다 (heudeureojida) is very, very tricky to translate. It most commonly refers to flowers not only in full bloom but in luxurious, abundant bloom, dripping off the branches until they droop:

The word also does not have to refer only to flowers, and it does have the secondary meaning of 'pleasing' or 'attractive.' However, in the context of "Karma," I believe only the first meaning is relevant.

So what does it mean for a heart to become overabundant in this way, nearly exploding with it? Especially when 'heart' here refers to the biological organ (though it can metaphorically still mean emotions)? How can that be conveyed? "burst into joyful bloom" is a valiant attempt to get the job done, but it loses the laugh, and is it abundant enough?

I think my personal best attempt comes to:

<We'll laugh until our heart erupts into bloom>

14: We ride the wind to a place beyond time

바람을 타고서 영원히 영원한 곳으로 riding the wind, eternally eternal, to that place

"바람을 타고서 영원히 영원한 곳으로"—this line startled me because a lot of poeticism is lost in translation! The Korean more literally reads, and I think is better translated as:

This part is a personal interpretation, but to me, that sounds a lot more like death than the official translation makes it sound!

15: If I’m with you, this love

그대와 함께라면 이 사랑 with you, if i'm together, this love

Technically, this translation is correct and completely acceptable! However, if we want to get just a little bit closer to the Korean, the Korean reads, "그대와 함께라면 이 사랑," with the word "함께" (hamggae) meaning 'together.' So, a slightly more literal translation:

Monologue 2

16: Hyuna, there’s something I need to confess

"현아 언니 고백할 게 있어요." hyuna unni, to confess, [I] have something

I'm sure for most of the Alien Stage fandom, this needs no introduction, but for those unfamiliar—in Korean, a younger person does not refer to someone older than them directly by name. In this case, instead of just calling her "Hyuna," Mizi actually calls her 현아 언니 (Hyuna unni), 'unni' being the kinship term that younger girls/women use towards older girls/women. Mizi using this means that she is giving Hyuna an adequate amount of age respect, while also implying a certain level of closeness between the two characters, as she is calling her "unni" instead of by a work/hierarchal title of some kind.

The official translation also chooses to say that Mizi has something she 'needs' to confess. There is no such sense of necessity in the Korean, making a more literal translation:

17: She was secretly rehearsing her death every night

"그 애는 매일 밤 남몰래 죽음을 연습하고 있었어요." that child, every night, secretly, death, [she] was practicing/rehearsing [it]

"그 애는 매일 밤 남몰래 죽음을 연습하고 있었어요." Once again, a localization choice was made here in an attempt to make it sound more natural in English—however, I disagree with what was omitted.

The Korean uses the term "그 애" (geu ae), literally meaning 'that child.' The word is inherently gender neutral, but in translation, it would be fine to gender in English based on context clues, meaning either 'that child' or 'that girl' would be fine here. In my own preferred translation, I do a mix:

18: And I knew, but pretended not to

"사실 알면서 모른 척했어." in truth, while knowing, [I] pretended not to know

"사실 알면서 모른 척했어." The official translation here chooses to connect this line to the previous with the conjunction 'and.' However, this phenomenon is not present in the Korean. Instead, the Korean literally reads, 'In truth, while knowing, I pretended not to.'

Interestingly enough, up to this point of the monologue, Mizi uses Korean's polite register, ending her sentences with -요 as one should towards someone that is not the same age as them, below them in rank, or someone that they are super close with and have mutually agreed to forgo formalities with. Here, Mizi speaks informally, and it adds a bluntness to her words.

19: Maybe I just wasn’t as desperate for her

"아마도 전 그 애한테 그렇게까지 절박하지 않았나 봐요." maybe I, to that child, to that extent [I] desperate, I must not have been that

"아마도 전 그 애한테 그렇게까지 절박하지 않았나 봐요." Back to polite register in the Korean, and it makes an impact—the reason the sentence looks longer in Korean is because it is, and it doesn't come off nearly as taciturn as the official translation. The official also says "as desperate for her," but it does not indicate what we are comparing Mizi too—as desperate compared to who or what?

The Korean does not have that kind of comparison built into it. Most literally, the Korean reads, 'Probably I, towards that child, I guess I wasn't desperate to that extent towards her.' A lot more hedging, a lot more introspective, and again that word 'child' could be 'girl.'

I think a more fluent English translation that would convey a similar tone would be:

20: I know my love was different from yours

"언니의 사랑과는 다르다는 거 알아요." [it] from unni's love is different, [I] know

The official translation chooses to translate this into the past tense, but the Korean actually does not indicate that—the Korean speaks in present tense, meaning a closer translation would be:

Although the Korean literally says "love" instead of "kind of love," I believe that this better conveys the sense of comparison between Mizi's love and Hyuna's love in the English than just "I know it's different from your love, unni" would.

21: But it was love too

"하지만, 이것 또한 사랑이었어요." but, this again/too is love

A general rule of thumb is that, if an English translation is ever shorter in length than the original Korean, there is a lot of meaning that has been lost in translation.

The Korean here literally reads, 'However, this too was love.' Localized a little bit for more fluent English and to better capture the emotion, I personally believe that the closest translation would be:

22: Who could really blame me?

"그 누가 뭐라 할 수 있겠어요?" that/just who, say something, could be able

There word and meaning of "blame" isn't really present in the Korean. In fact, I believe that the English phrase, "who could blame X?" gives the wrong impression, where the assignment of responsibility is what's most important.

The Korean can be read two ways, and my peer reviewer and I had different reads on it. With my reading, the Korean reads more like, 'who could criticize/rebuke me for that?' With my friend's, if I'm remembering correctly, it reads more like, 'What could anyone say about that?'

This ambiguity comes from the fact that the literal Korean reads, 'Who could say what/something [about that]?' which is similarly ambiguous in the English. Korean is a language that uses implications a lot, so rather than saying 'someone scolded me,' it's common to use the phrasing, 'they said [something] to me,' with the surrounding context implying that that 'something' is negative. As such, it is difficult to tell what 'something' means in this line 100%.

My friend made the case that if the songwriter meant "rebuke" or "criticize" or "blame," they would have used the word 질책 (jilchaek), which they use in the next lime and translate to "judge." I am inclined to agree that an accurate English translation should preserve this distinction. As such, my recommendation ends up as the following:

23: If you'd seen the look on her face too, you wouldn't be able to judge me either.

"언니도 그 애의 표정을 봤다면 나를 질책할 수 없을걸요?" unni too, that child's expression, if you saw it, criticizing me, you probably couldn't do it

most literally translates to, 'Unni as well, that child's expression, if you had seen it, you probably couldn't rebuke me either.' As mentioned above, the word translated to "judge" more accurately is translated to 'rebuke' or 'reprimand.' Judging can be a passive action, but 질책 cannot. 질책 is an active action against someone, sharp words said to express disapproval or criticism.

Additionally, even though Mizi saying 'unni' is mostly a result of Korean linguistic rules, this particular line could have been phrased accurately even without it. As such, I feel like it is important to retain it in the translation, much like how in English, someone might say someone's name to try and appeal to their emotions. If someone wants to localize it, they could replace it with "Hyuna," but in my translation, I would have it as:

Because I can't find a way to slot 'probably' into the English in a natural way, I try to compensate for it by changing 'couldn't' to 'wouldn't be able to,' trying to soften how certain Mizi sounds by adding more mitigating language.

Song Pt. 2 Lines 24-27 are the same as 12-15.

❗Monologue 3❗ This entire monologue has a lot of nuance lost in translation! In fact, I believe that a closer translation of the Korean lends itself to a completely different impression of Mizi. Both my peer reviewer and I believe this section of the official translation is deeply misleading.

28: You’ve been running away from the very beginning

"애초에 당신은 도망치고 있는 것뿐이야." to begin with, you (formal) [are] running away, that's all it is

Whereas in the previous monologue, Mizi spoke in polite register, here she is blunt and informal—though not so informal that she uses the casual form of 'you.' She uses the word "당신" (dangshin), which while formal also gives a sense of distance and unfamiliarity.

You'll also notice as we progress in this monologue, there's no more fond 'unni's in this section.

All the same, however, the official translation comes off as accusing in a different way than the Korean. Additionally, "been running away" gives the impression that Mizi is speaking about a stretch of time that starts in the past and continues to present day. The Korean is in present tense. I personally believe a more accurate translation of the tone would be as follows:

29: Not once did you face your real feelings

"단 한 순간도 자신의 진짜 감정을 직면하지 않았지." even one moment, your own real feelings, you didn't face them

What I said before about the length of the translation vs. the Korean stands here. The more accurate translation here would be:

30: ❗Did clinging to some noble cause or sense of justice ever really fix anything?❗

"적당한 대의나 정의 같은 것에 매달리면 뭔가 해결되는 것 같았나요?" adequate cause or righteousness/justice, something like that, if you cling to it, something being resolved, did it feel like that?

Once again, this is an incredibly difficult translation. However, in its attempt, I believe the official translation loses a lot of important nuance. A more literal Korean translation would read, 'An adequate cause or sense of justice, if you clung to something like that, did it feel like something was being resolved?'

Hopefully you can tell—the accusation being made is inherently different. The official English reads as though Mizi is criticizing Hyuna's ineffectiveness, and it loses the implied meaning in accusing someone of clinging to a cause that's just good enough, merely adequate—not noble, not grand—just suited to one's own needs.

So in this sense, an accurate translation would be, <If you clung to an adequate cause or sense of justice, did it feel like something was being resolved?> However, I personally feel as though it's possible to localize this further, and that it may be more tonally accurate to translate it as:

Criticizing Hyuna a bit more directly for what Mizi perceives to be hypocrisy or deluding herself for, in Mizi's view, selfish reasons.

31: But what came of it? A meaningless death

"돌아온 게 그 개죽음이고." what returns is that dog's death

The Korean here literally says, 'What you got in return was that dog's death.' Both my peer reviewer and I am not sure why the official translation did not choose to use the phrase 'dying like a dog' or 'a dog's death,' both of which are known phrases in the English language.

A meaningless death, yes, but more than that—an undignified death, a shameful one. And perhaps this is just me or it's more implied in the Korean, but to me this offers a little more insight as to Mizi's angry and critical tone in this section—when someone you respect meets a miserable end, and you feel like it's that person's own fault; the anger born of care.

32: ❗And even if we’d been granted freedom, we’d have still felt alone❗

"자유가 주��진다 한들 우린 똑같이 외로웠을 거예요." freedom, even if it had been given, we all the same would be lonely

The word used in the Korean that was translated to 'feeling alone' is 외로움 (ueroeum), which means loneliness, which lends a different emotional weight to this line. Additionally, this line again uses the conjunction 'and' to connect this line to the previous, when in the Korean, it remains an independent sentence.

33: Because humans are the root of all this pain

"인간 그 자체가 이 모든 괴로움의 ��범이니까." humans as they are/humanity itself, all of this suffering, [they] are the culprit of it

My peer reviewer suggested to me that the word used for 'humans' here, '인간' (in-gan), in this context means more humanity as a whole or, if it isn't too off-putting for the narrative, the human species. Since Alien Stage is science fiction, I feel that 'human species' is a viable option and heavily considered it, but @lace-kmedia reminded me the term 'human race' existed, so that's the winner here haha.

"Root" is also a word both my peer reviewer and I took issue with. The word "주범" (joobeom) means 'culprit' and assigns a sense of criminality to the word. My friend suggested that humans being the "source of all this pain" is a more fitting translation than "root," which erroneously gives the sense that humanity is the progenitor of suffering or the point from which suffering all descends, whereas 'source' moreso implies the origin of a more temporary state or condition. However, I feel that 'source' might lose that sense of agency or blame that comes with someone being a 'culprit'.

A fun fact that is lost in the English is that in Korean, the word for 'loneliness,' 외로움, and the word for 'suffering/agony,' 괴로움, technically rhyme as long as they are in the same tense. In these two lines however, they are not, so the rhyme is halved. In any case, my suggested translation for this line would be:

34: ❗We’re creatures who can’t seem to love without exploiting❗

"사랑하면서도 착취하지 않고선 살아갈 수 없는 존재들이니까." even as [humans] love, without exploiting, [they] can't survive, they're existences like that.

A little inscrutable, but breaking it down, the meaning is that we humans can't survive without exploiting, either 'even as we love' or 'even the things/those we love.' Given the nature of the story, and Mizi's narrative, I believe the latter may be more accurate.

Additionally, although the official translation chooses to use different sentence structures between Line 33 and Line 34, in the Korean, they are actually the same sentence structure, both implying causality.

Lastly, the word translated into 'creatures,' "존재" (jonjae), more typically means 'existence,' with the plural "존재들" (jonjaedeul) being 'existences.' As such, I believe a translation that gives a clearer picture would be:

Song Pt. 3 Lines 35-38 are the same as 12-15.

Monologue 4

39 & 40: For humans... and for these beasts too, innocence was a luxury they couldn’t afford

"인간에겐, 그리고 이 짐승들에겐 어린 것의 순수함은 사치였다." to humans, and also to these beasts, a young thing's innocence was a luxury

Although the official translation is quite close to the Korean, it chooses to sacrifice what I personally believe to be a key nuance.

The Korean more literally translates to, 'To humans, and to these beasts, the innocence of children was a luxury.' That is to say, rather than just innocence, it is youthful naivety that is a luxury.

Additionally, although the official translation says that it was a 'luxury they couldn't afford,' the idea that humans cannot afford said luxury—while implied—is not explicit in the Korean. As such, perhaps a closer translation would have been:

However, because English is a more explicit language in general, perhaps 'a luxury they couldn't afford' is a fair localization.

42: In this endless suffering

"끝나지 않는 고통 속에서..." unending pain, within it

The official translation chooses the word 'suffering' here, but in my translation, I used 'suffering' already for a different word. So, to retain the diversity of vocabulary, I choose to translate "고통" (gotong) to 'agony' instead, which I also believe is the closer nuance, as this word is more often used for physical pain than 괴로움, much like the word agony.

42: To love and be loved

"사랑하고 사랑하며." loving and [while?] loving

Although I understand why the official chose to translate this to "to love and be loved," a far more common English phrase, I personally believe that it's a little misleading as to the themes of the song.

The Korean literally translates to, 'Loving and while loving,' with the first 'loving' referring to act loving something/someone and the latter referring to the ongoing act of loving; or, alternatively, it could simply be a Korean grammatical structure joining two clauses about a similar idea:

43: To hold onto hope for a day that may never come

"언젠가 올 날의 희망을 품는 것은..." that will some day come, a day, to hold hope for it

Although the official chooses to phrase it as "a day that may never come," the Korean actually does not use any negative terms. The literal translation would read, 'For a day that will come someday, to carry a hope for that…'

This is significant because it is possible to phrase 'a day that may never come' in Korean as well, so if the songwriter intended it to read that way, I believe they would have phrased it differently. So, perhaps a more fluent English version of the positive phrasing would be:

44: ‼️Is that a survival instinct, or selfishness‼️

"살고자 하는 ��능가, 이타심인가?" is it an instinct to live on/survive, is it altruism/selflessness?

Double exclamation marks because this one is an outright mistranslation! The word translated to "selfishness" is actually 이타심 (itashim), which literally means 'altruism' and can metaphorically mean 'selflessness'—it means the opposite of what the official translation says.

Additionally, although "살고자 하는 본능" (salgoja haneun bonneung) literally translates to 'an instinct to try to live,' Korean has its own different word for 'survival instinct,' which is '생존본능' (saengjon bonneung). Since the Korean does not use that term, this should not be translated as 'survival instinct,' particularly since in colloquial English usage, 'survival instinct' has come to mean more of an awareness of danger rather than a drive to survive.

Perhaps a closer translation would be:

45: ❗At the center of it all was a woman❗

"그 중심에 있던 여자..." the center of that, the woman who was there

Whereas the official English makes this an independent clause (i.e. complete sentence), the Korean is actually a noun phrase more literally translated to, 'The woman in the middle it.' Changing it to an independent clause for localization purposes is an understandable decision, but it isn't my personal preference, as I prefer to preserve as much of the Korean structure as I can.

As another note, I considered heavily the possibility of this line being read more as, 'In between an instinct for survival and altruism was a woman,' but after a long discussion with my friend, it appears that would be a highly uncommon reading for the word '중심' (joongshim), which is one of Korean's many words for the various nuances of 'center' or 'middle.' I still believe that it is a possible reading, but when I cannot confirm it, it would be irresponsible of me to push the more uncommon reading in a general translation.

Fun fact, the characters for 중심 are 中 'middle', and 心 'heart,' which I thought was interesting considering one of the video's main motifs.

46: A woman now called a witch, who always searched for love

"지금은 마녀라 불리는 그 여자는 늘 사랑을 찾곤 했다." now called a witch, that woman continually, love, looked for it

The official translation in turn converts this line into a dependent clause, whereas the Korean makes this one the independent clause. Most literally, it translates to, 'The woman who is now called a witch continuously looked for love.'

The nuance between 'search' and 'look for' is difficult to explain… Perhaps it is that 'search' feels broader? Rather than searching for something in a broad area, the implication is more that she was more so focused on finding something specific. I believe the Korean also more so seems to imply that she was looking to be loved rather than her seeking out instances of love that she could be third party to or a romantic relationship. Perhaps a closer translation would be:

47: ❗Can we really blame her for that?❗

"그 사랑을 탓할 수 있을까?" that love, blame it, could [I, we, she, etc.]?

The official translation here ends up giving the impression the same words were used and meanings were implied as Mizi's monologue earlier when this is not the case at all. The word used and the meaning used are completely different, making this a false parallel that doesn't exist in the Korean. Whereas 질책 used earlier did not mean 'blame,' the word "탓" (tat) can mean 'blame' or to 'fault' someone for something.

However, the official translation assigns this question of 'blame' to Mizi, whereas the Korean actually assigns it to the aforementioned 'love.' In the structure of the official translation, I believe, <Can we really fault her for that love?> is a viable localization, but a closer translation would be:

48: Where did this original sin begin?

"이 원죄의 굴레는 어디서부터 왔으며…" this original sin's restraints, from what point did they come

Although the official translation gets the gist of it, it sacrifices the nuance of a key word—굴레 (gool-lae), which means 'bonds' or 'restrictions.' As such, a closer translation would be:

49: And in the face of a trial with no clear answer

"도무지 해답이 없는 시련을…" [this] utterly solution-less trial/test/hardship

Once again, the official translation here is completely fair. However, I personally would choose different synonyms to prevent ambiguity in the English ('trial' here meaning challenge or hardship, rather than a criminal trial) and as a matter of tone preference ('solution' implying specifically the answer to a problem rather than an answer to a question).

Also as a note, there is no mention of "in the face of" in the Korean—most literally, it reads, 'This hardship utterly without solution…' to be completed with the next line. To try to preserve that while retaining a sense of English fluency, perhaps this may be a closer translation:

50: can these lives ever overcome it?

"이 생명들이 극복할 수 있을까?" these lives, overcome it, could they?

The word "생명" (saengmyeong) specifically refers to life in the sense of, "Is there life on other planets?" or "life sciences" or "life support"—biological vitality or the living things that have that kind of vitality. However, in English, as the official did, it neatly translates to:

Conclusion:

Phew! If you read all that, thank you so much for sticking around! I hope it was an enjoyable read, albeit long. If you have any further questions, please feel free to send me an ask.

I intend to upload my usual Literal Translation, Readable Translation, Singable Translyrics later, so keep an eye out for it!

#alnst #alnst translation #alnst mizi #alien stage #lacuna translates #alnst karma #KOR to ENG #lost in translation #translation #alnst meta

70 notes · View notes

confuzing · 2 days ago

Text

I have exactly one MDZS AU idea and it goes like this:

Lan Xichen turns up at the Impure Realm with A-Yuan and hands him off to Nie Mingjue like, "Please watch this, k thanks BRB."

NMJ: So you're a... baby of some kind?

A-Yuan: *pokes his nose*

NMJ: ...Adorable.

So NMJ sets A-Yuan up on the floor with some crayons (Lan kids like art right?) and gets back to his paperwork.

Enter Jin Guangyao here to play NMJ his chill time music. He doesn't notice A-Yuan and NMJ doesn't point him out. He's halfway through his Totally Normal And Not Sabotaged music when A-Yuan goes "Eww."

JGY: What.

NMJ: Oh? *pulls baby Lan from under desk* Why'd you say that?

A-Yuan, in tiniest baby voice: ...played it wrong

JGY: *is Offended™*

NMJ: *laughs* Oh did he? Well you heard the little man JGY, you're fired.

JGY: Where'd you get him from anyway?

NMJ: LXC gave him to me.

JGY: ????

Meanwhile Lan Wangji has not been taking good care of himself or even pretending to be repentant, so LXC stole A-Yuan in an effort to get his bro to chill out. He was just going to bring A-Yuan with him while he visited some friends and then bring him back but LWJ wasn't having that and immediately started following him. Hence LXC handing A-Yuan off and leaving. He's been trying to corral LWJ back to bed. It didn't work and now both of them show up again. LWJ to get A-Yuan back and LXC like, "please just sit down for ten minutes I am begging you."

So now there's three Lans involved. LWJ interprets A-Yuan's "dadada da DA da"s into music and yep, the Lans all agree JGY is playing the song wrong.

(JGY: You believe a 4 year old on this?

LXC: Oh yes, A-Yuan has perfect pitch)

NMJ pulls LWJ and kiddo aside to ask if this could be malicious. LWJ admits there are songs that can harm people but he doesn't know if this was one.

End result of this is that NMJ offers to host LWJ and A-Yuan for a bit since there's clearly a lot of tension in Gusu at the moment, and LWJ can play the correct music. JGY gets off with an "oopsy I thought I had it" and LXC agrees that letting someone else fuss over LWJ for a bit would be nice. NMJ puts his little brother on it.

That's where the idea mostly ends? I kinda just want to make this A-Yuan increasingly ruining JGY's plans completely on accident until the mere mention of the kid makes his eye twitch.

He's just beefing with this sweet little boy and he can't find a way to make anything bad stick to him! Not even the Wen thing!

JGY, as dramatically as possible: Lan Sizhui is a Wen!!!

NMJ: Yeah we know. I figured it out when he was like five. LWJ is not good at keeping secrets.

LXC: And I was the one who added him to the Lan records so I've always known.

JGY: Oh. Uh, nevermind then?

LXC and NMJ: *nod and sip tea*

Other bits and pieces:

-NMJ and his emotional support toddler A-Yuan. ( Turns out spending time with babies/small children helps chill him out too.)

-Jin Ling is like "Uncle I made a new friend!" And JGY is happy up until he realizes it's LSZ.

-I feel like in the interest of ruining all JGY's plans LSZ is eventually going to find Wen Ning.

#mdzs #I know I mostly post svsss but I do like all the MXTXs #lan sizhui #nie mingjue #jin guangyao #lan xichen #lan wangji #I don't think NMJ would have a problem with LSZ being a Wen by birth #besides some comments on how it's good the Lans are raising him right #JC might have a problem with it but I feel like he'd realize which Wen baby A-Yuan was specifically and then just be eaten alive by guilt #and then never end up doing anything about it

34 notes · View notes

yanderes-galore · 2 days ago

Note

Robb Stark vs Jon snow concept x reader who maybe has a dog that gets along with Grey Wind and Ghost? :3

Really hate how they don't have a ton of interaction in the books or the show, so here's an AU where you grew up alongside them in Winterfell and they didn't leave until adults. For plot. Even then this was still surprisingly difficult to write.

Yandere! Robb Stark vs Jon Snow

(Karstark! Darling)

Pairing: Romantic - Rivalry

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Possessive/Protective behavior, Jealousy, Swearing, Sibling rivalry, Illegitimate heir issues, Stalking, Blood, Murder, Trauma, Imprisonment, Some parts are implied to be female oriented if you squint?, Dubious relationship(s)

Imagine being a Karstark who often visits the Starks.

Since you were young you've often met with the Stark children.

For which there were many.

However, two of them were the ones you often played with.

Robb, the eldest son, and Jon, the bastard of the family.

Your father, as a Karstark, often worked with the Starks due to how closely linked your families are.

Which often meant you saw the two boys in Winterfell.

You often tried to play with them when you were really young.

The boys naturally seemed to get along with you, your father encouraging you to play nice.

When you became a teen, your father had presented you with a hound to take care of.

Your hound was meant to protect you in the harsh winters and be a companion when you got lonely.

You often brought your hound with you on visits to Winterfell.

Of course, all the Stark children ended up getting dire wolves as pets around this time too.

You were so ecstatic to see your two best friends have puppies too, the two men amused with how giddy you were to watch the hounds play.

Sure, your dog was more domesticated than the wolves...

But the three creatures seemed to play nice just like you did with their owners.

You had always gotten along with the two eldest Stark men.

Their wolves even seemed to enjoy you too, Ghost and Grey Wind never seeming to leave you three alone.

Yet the wolves were usually occupied by your own hound.

In terms of how both of the Stark men acted around you...

Robb is more serious, being the eldest of the Starks.

He's charming with you, probably even having an interest in you since you were young.

He acts like a gentleman, often wanting to walk around Winterfell with you and be a good influence on you.

Part of him hopes to even impress your father... Originally just to be a good friend.

Yet something more later on.

Jon's the more reserved one, often brooding or distant whenever Robb steals your attention.

He originally thinks he doesn't deserve your attention... Robb's true born, after all.

Yet what Jon always liked about you was the fact you never judged him for his Snow name.

You still treated him as a friend, playing with him and Ghost... a smile on your face that he adores....

Jon has always vowed to protect you, uncaring of his nature as a bastard.

Even his 'mother' often ignored Jon, in favor of Robb more.

You make Jon feel cared for and needed... his beloved childhood friend....

However, both men seem to have similar interests in their childhood companion.

Which leads to some intense sibling rivalry.

I have a feeling what makes this rivalry intense is the fact Jon is a bastard.

Rob's the eldest son and legitimate, which means he has more claim in everything.

Property, power, who he marries...

Robb, if his mother and your father would allow it, may allow you to marry.

Jon, on the other hand, struggles to have his claim supported since he feels wanted by no one but you.

Robb, especially when he and Jon are young, may also rub it in.

Robb proudly says he knows what his heart wants, that when he's older, you two will marry and take over Winterfell.

Jon often disagrees, saying Robb gets enough as the eldest son.

For once Jon wants to be loved, to care for someone... You're the only one Jon wants.

So why does Robb want to claim you too?

Robb, in response to this, usually fires back that Jon can't be with a Karstark like you.

Your name is too important, so unless Jon is legitimized, politically your safest match would be with Robb.

Safe to say, even as young teens, these two nearly get into physical altercations in the snow often.

When they were younger, their father had to end up prying them away, scolding his young sons.

Even their wolves end up showing their interest.

While both aren't fully experienced in being wargs... Their wolves follow you and your dog... or even get into altercations sometimes.

But around you? The two try to get along.

After all, they both have a crush on you, but you're unaware.

They've been like this for years once puberty hit, both young men showing interest in their Karstark companion.

Your father probably knew... but never confirmed any matches between you and the Stark sons.

Originally their interest comes out when they're playing with you.

They always make one out to be a villain, the other a swordsman or knight meant to escort you.

They swap the role around, determined to see how you react.

Yet any actual attempts at courting would happen when you're all older.

You still come to Winterfell when you come, your hound by your side.

You are quite fond of both your Stark admirers, yet you try not to entertain anything.

Your father may want you to marry someone else... but the Starks do have good choices.

Both men no doubt try to impress your father when he takes you to Winterfell for business.

Considering how both men might be leaving Winterfell... They want to try and claim your heart now.

Robb knows he has to go off for war against the Lannisters, especially when it's said his father was executed.

But before that, the eldest Stark son hopes to take you as his lover.

Robb's giving you winter flowers, complimenting your looks, offering to take you on walks...

He's vowing to your father that he'll take good care of you, that he'd protect you from everything.

Even better if you're a Karstark... Robb may be side by side with you when your father leaves with Robb if he's lucky.

Jon, on the other hand, is telling your father you'd be much safer at Winterfell.

I imagine in this alternate telling of events Jon wouldn't go to the Night Watch right off.

He wants to see if he has a chance with you first... and if he does, how far he can push it.

But it isn't meant to be... yet....

Robb may want a family with you... Jon doesn't, not unless he can have your hand in marriage.

Both Northern men are quite passionate with you, their childhood companion and shared crush.

Even their wolves yearn for attention, pestering your own hound or you.

You have no clue this is them subconsciously showing their emotions through their dire wolf.

Anything past this is a bit hard to write.

I say this because their stories are so different and they're miles away from one another.

Robb, while off fighting, could speak with your father about your hand in marriage.

Robb definitely takes advantage of the fact Jon joined the Watch.

He knows Jon is meant to be sworn to celibacy and is far from here... So Robb may make attempts to win you over.

He's the best choice anyways, isn't he?

Jon still likes to be hopeful... Even in the Watch he still thinks of you, his first love.

In terms of who I think would win this rivalry...? If you want to go with canon... It's Jon.

Perhaps things start with you and Robb.

He doesn't manage to win over the marriage proposal, but that's fine....

Robb still manages to convince you to explore with him in secret.

His mother probably knows but says nothing, she always knew her sons adored the Karstark that seems just as wild as a wolf pup at times.

Robb knows politically he has to marry someone else for access to the bridge... But his heart was always for you.

For a long time you're with Robb while Jon matures at the Wall.

Honestly... It becomes less a rivalry once they're away... and more like you being passed to the other?

Robb is possessive just like Grey Wind who's always at his side.

He always keeps an eye on you, even through his wolf.

It's actually a bit amusing to see him so distracted when your own hound plays with Grey Wind, Robb himself unable to focus due to being in a playful mood.

You're no warg... but he takes out his playful behavior on you by keeping you close.

You start by having secret relations with Robb due to being the closest with him emotionally and physically.

It's a nice and passionate secret relationship... that is tragically put down by the time of the Red Wedding.

You're not left with much after escaping such a relationship.

Your father died due to treason, your lover assassinated, which forces you to flee the aftermath of the Red Wedding with blood on your hands.

You don't meet Jon again until way later... The young bastard who struggled to tell you goodbye now known as 'Lord Snow' and gathering forces.

He never forgot you, he just knew you'd probably be happier with Robb....

But by the time he sees you again, shaking with a beyond troubled look in your eyes...

Jon wishes he stayed at Winterfell and convinced your father to leave you with him... even if he was a bastard...

Jon hears everything from your lips.

How you used to belong to Robb... How you witnessed the death of everyone you both cared about... How you had to crawl away with blood staining your furs.

It... shocks Jon... makes the man filled with rage, actually.

Jon wanted you to himself, yes...

But he isn't sure if this is the way he wished for it to happen.

Jon hides his possessive nature, noticing the only companion you've had since the death of his brother has been your dog.

Said dog just as weary as you, Ghost quietly licking them with a whine.

Jon is caring with you for days, taking care of you in secret as he lets you have a shoulder to cry upon.

He doesn't care about his oath at this point... He's broken so many morals at this point.

He has mixed feelings on the death of Robb.

On one hand, he's glad he has you for himself now... on the other...

He doesn't like seeing you so sad.

Jon's the last one you end up with, be it book or show canon.

He manages to make you comfortable enough to confide in him... Maybe even encouraging you to allow him to be your man.

It's manipulative, yes, but you agree since he really is all you have now....

That's fine with him... To Jon, far as he knows, you're all he has too.

Jon is overprotective and possessive similar to his brother... Except you don't see it as anything all that bad this time.

You're both affected by loss, loss that might've been prevented by better choices.

Jon vows to never leave you alone again, he regrets not staying in Winterfell to care for you...

Bastard or not, Jon wanted to be a man for you....

Sure, he can do it now... but you've lost too much.

But... that's okay... He'll make sure it's okay....

He'll make sure you never lose anything ever again.

He doesn't care if he needs to lock you away from danger... or bloody his blade even more than it already is....

The rivalry is gone now... Jon has you now...

Nothing's going to take you away from him again...

Possibly not even death will quell the draconic burn he feels in his heart for you... just like when he was young.

#yandere asoiaf #yandere got #yandere game of thrones #yandere robb stark #yandere jon snow

26 notes · View notes

avsanderoth · 10 hours ago

Text

Writing Techniques #5: Tension

A potential umbrella term for everything spine-curling in your book, tension is the means by which a work generates intentional discomfort for the reader. Putting the fates of the parties involved into question, forcing the question “what will happen next?” into their head and gluing their eyes to the page until a resolution comes.

Be that as it may, generating tension isn’t as easy as putting your characters in a bad spot - it’s conveying that through language, emotion and action.

Do you want me to die?

What I like to consider first is precisely what is going to generate tension in the scene I’m about to write. Maybe it’s the protagonist being chased by a monster that suddenly appears, maybe it’s a deal with a mob boss breaking down while they’re surrounded by their goons, maybe it’s an argument between friends or lovers that risks to destroy the relationship.

The context will determine what you need to do in order to generate tension, since the “stakes” aren’t quite the same. The monster kills, the mob betrays, the heart breaks - then, the question becomes what to say and describe in order to balloon those ideas in the mind of the reader.

I would broadly sort the three scenarios above into the categories physical, capital and social loss. Below are some general tips for handling each one.

Physical loss is all about threatening the reader with injury, and so you want to draw attention to that as much as you can. Focus on gnashing teeth, sharp, jagged claws, blades that shimmer in the sunlight and destruction in the name of killing. The threat needs an identity, and so don’t be afraid to give it one: describe the monster’s features, the collapsing building’s cracking supports and rumbling foundation, the cold-blooded assassin’s empty glare and inhuman efficiency. Note that, if possible, having the victim “fight back” can often generate even more tension than if they flee.

Capital loss is the result of a gamble, and often with forces beyond the gambler’s power to ward off. It’s losing macguffins, homes, money, other supplies they need. That last word is especially important, the need. If your protagonist is robbed or otherwise has something taken from them, it must be something important, something they would want back or cannot continue without. Generating tension for a capital loss can be done via forcing the protagonist to negotiate with people much more powerful than them, and not being afraid to have the deal fall through. Tension doesn’t mean anything if it’s always resolved positively.

Social loss might be the easiest to outline, but is by far the most nuanced to write. There are so many things that factor into a relationship breaking down, things that make the scene shine when included but leave the reader confused if forgotten. The main thing I can recommend for something so diverse is to not “punish” a character with social loss out of the blue. There needs to be a build-up of distrust, suspicion that something’s off. One exception is the protagonist or similar betraying a supporting character, which can be more sudden since the reader can follow the protag’s thought process throughout. Even then, don’t make the choice easy!

Importantly, tension can be generated from multiple sources of loss at once. Physical and social loss interface when the protagonist is forced to betray an ally, and they immediately begin fighting - capital and social loss interface when the result of a deal determines whether a harsh parental figure will continue to support you. I wouldn’t stress about threatening the reader with the same kind of loss multiple times, but variation is always nice!

Fight or flight

With that in mind, the nitty-gritty of generating tension will come down to the emotions you communicate to the reader. For your audience to feel tense, the characters have to feel the same. Especially when you generate tension, you have to show stress, or fear, or adrenaline, not just tell it. If there’s any point in your work where the reader should get so immersed they might as well be the protagonist, it should be here.

Describe their racing heart, digits flexing and unflexing, breathing growing faster and faster building up to hyperventilation! A flush of heat, the cold sweat, building dizziness, fear for what could be that gets pushed down by a rush of adrenaline so intense it practically puts them in autopilot! Be physical, be painful, be scared.

On the topic of fear, it’s quite integral to generating tension. Alas, for fear of this post being way too long, it will get its own blog… And very soon.

Be that as it may, once the tension is resolved (for better or for worse), you’ll want to think about the comedown phase. That doesn’t always mean your character’s heart slow down, or that they feel any sense of relief. Maybe the comedown is curling into a ball wherever the conflict has left them, and allowing the tears they’ve held back to flow freely. Maybe it’s a sense of anger over the result, lashing out physically whether at objects or people.

Or, maybe it is relief. Maybe the deal did go through, maybe they managed to save their relationship, maybe the monster lost them. How does that feel? Are they elated, exhausted just relieved, or some mixture of the three? Even after your tension is resolved, a period afterwards will be just as physical. The pulse that eventually slows, long breaths in and yet longer exhalations as your character does their best to calm themselves. In scenes like these, your characters can show themselves for who they really are - don’t be afraid to use that opportunity.

Rock bottom

Finally, well… What should happen to resolve the tension? Should there be victory, or loss, or something in between?

The ratio of victories and losses that your characters experience has the effect of determining the “energy” of your work, to an extent, but in a very particular way. The genre or nature of your story doesn’t necessarily mean you have to resolve tension positively that many times or negatively this many times. There are definitely worlds where the “feel” encourages one of the two - for example, a story in a grimdark world might want to include more loss to fit the theme - but it’s nowhere near as controlling for how you want to tell your story as something like pacing.

I can only say one thing concretely: you need to have both. A story of undisturbed victory loses tension for the reader knows the characters will always win. Meanwhile, a story of constant loss risks becoming so gloomy it loses meaning: sorrow as the characters experience it becomes empty, just another instance of the same plot device.

Ultimately, these kind of things tend to solve themselves when writing, but keeping them in mind when editing is a very good idea.

The end

Again, thanks for reading! This is my twelfth writing tips post on this blog, and I’ve somehow already got 25 followers!!! You’re all so awesome and cool and epic!! Knowing that somebody’s benefitting from these things is what keeps me writing them, so again, thank you all so much for the support. Some upcoming blogs I have planned are a post on “show, don’t tell”, and a new writing emotions installment. Hope you enjoy them, when they come out!

#avsanderoth #writing #writerscommunity #writers on tumblr #writeblr #writer things #writer problems #creative writing #writers block #writers and poets #fanfiction writer #writing things #writer

22 notes · View notes

chezzywezzy · 1 day ago

Text

Yandere Joshua Washington (3/?)

WC: 3.5k

“No, R…” Josh sighed. There was a strange look in his eyes. Almost… happiness. Has he truly been so starved of human connection? “You never deserved this either. I fucking hate them. All of them. I fucking guess I always will, honestly. But you should’ve never had that happen to you. I’m sorry you have to live with that. If it’s any consolation - it - it… It fucking isn’t even my sisters being dead that makes me hate them. It’s the fucking aftermath, how they acted, how I acted, how everything happened. How I acted was fucked, R. Honestly, I'm not even better than them, either!

“I mean, you were right. I was fucking suffocating. I was selfish and I never even thought about you. I only thought about me, and how angry I was, and how much I needed you, and… Fuck. I should’ve been there for you, or listened. I guess I regret drinking too much, but I regret putting all the pressure on you to fucking… fix me. But… I’m going to fix it myself. You’re right. I’m the only one who can, so… I guess what I mean to say is that… this trip is gonna fix everything. I… I promise.”

R gulped and broke eye contact. Her heart was drumming across her entire body. In that moment, it was hard to interpret his words beyond face value. It was strange to her, because it seemed that his eyes were darker, angrier, more desperate than before, ever since she’d gotten here. But his words reflected a world of change.

“Joshie… you don’t have to ‘fix’ yourself alone. You’re not someone who needs fixing,” she comforted, sending a smile. “You just need healing and support. And I’m sorry, too, because I was not kind to you, either. We’ve both done things wrong, but neither of us to blame, I think. I wish… I could’ve been there for you better.”

“Do… do you think we would still be together if I, like, grieved differently?”

R blinked in surprise, the mood shifting. Suddenly, Josh’s eyes weren’t so wide, instead half-lidded and eager with hope. His throat bowed as he gulped, and his grip on her hips were slowly drifting higher and dancing against her arms.

Ben’s face flashed in her mind and she leaned against the marble counter, attempting to create distance. Her hands pushed gently against his chest as she chuckled dryly. “It’s not… good to speculate, Josh. I think it’s nice that we’re such good friends.”

A frown threatened to show but his head suddenly craned to meet her’s. She felt the distance between their faces - it was nothing more than mere inches, and it frightened her. R knew that it was never attraction she felt to Josh anymore; it was guilt, concern, and the love that she’d have for a friend. Besides… she had Ben.

“Yeah, I guess so, so… uh, do you think there’s a world where we —“

“No, Josh. I mean, I guess I can’t know, but this isn’t something to talk about right now. Seriously, give me some space.”

“Please, R, if he wasn’t around, would there ever be a chance?”

She frowned and wanted to shake her head, fingers applying pressure against his chest. But before she could vocalize, Josh had shut his eyes and closed the distance. After two years, his chapped lips felt foreign against her’s. Unnatural, even. R’s gasp gurgled in her throat as she felt his hands weave into her hair and his body pressed against her own. In that moment, R had frozen from shock.

The kiss had lasted but a moment before Josh fully stepped away. His brows were furrowed, but he was breathless. He gripped at his t-shirt. R couldn’t even muster a glare as she watched the man mutter an insincere apology and disappear from sight.

R was left stunned for several minutes, replaying the conversation in her head. It’s been two years, but the man still felt that way? He’d played his cards right - but R could not even call him manipulative when all his words seemed truthful. Perhaps it was a fluke - a mistake. Nothing more than a mere reflection of the past.

Either way, R did not want to be left in the unknown any longer. She felt somewhat tipsy from the wine she downed. And with one more quick swig, she ventured upstairs. Her movements were quick, stumbling, and thoughtless as she pulled on a pair of sweatpants and an additional sweater and grabbed her cell phone.

She wanted to call Ben, even as a small snow storm had begun outside; one that wasn’t nearly as harsh as that night, but somewhat aggravating nonetheless. She couldn’t help but wonder why Jessica and Mike weren’t around yet, even though hours had passed. And why Sam had vanished off the planet. And why Matt and Emily still weren’t back from town.

R began tramping downstairs toward the front entrance. The entire lodge was eerily silent.

And then, darkness. The dim lighting faded and R was left to adjust to the pitch black. Not even moonlight escaped through the windows.

It was uneasy for R as she called out a hello and asked if Josh was there. However, she wished she’d been met with silence, because instead, a muffled cry for help escaped the floorboards beneath her.

R was quick to cover her mouth. That sounded like… Josh. Suddenly, her blood ran cold. Something strange had been happening ever since she’d arrive, and it started with Ben. Had someone broken in? Was there an attacker?

She immediately ran to the kitchen and threw open drawers, using nothing but her dim phone flashlight. R was nothing short of surprised by the fact that every knife had disappeared. Even the forks, too. So, instead, she grabbed the wok off the hanging rack and clutched it firmly in one hand.

It felt stupid to admit, but she was stuck. Somebody had orchestrated… something. All she could do was hide or investigate. Without electricity, which stemmed exclusively from the ski lift, everyone was trapped here and could not call for help. It felt like the work of more than one person - someone cut the power while the other infiltrates.

Right?

R slowly approached the basement stairs. Every step was methodical and slow. A single creak would reveal her location above. As she stood on the other side of the door, she gulped. Perhaps whoever was inside was already waiting on the other side of the door. She primed the wok in her hand and shut off the flashlight.

She’d been here before. Strangers would not know the layout as easily, right?

As she swung the door open, she swung the wok. But it hit nothing but air. And as she gazed down into the overwhelming darkness, it did not stir. Nobody was waiting to ambush her. Yet.

Some light from the doorway followed her as she descended. Every time a step creaked, she flinched. But what scared her further was the utter silence. It was almost as though it had been to draw her there and nothing else.

As she made it to the bottom and stepped onto the cold cement as the basement lacked any heating, she shivered. R stared into the darkness beyond. The basement had always been large - so large she’d never explored it.

Creak.

R swerved and peered at the top of the stairs. Standing in the doorway as the door was slowly pulled shut behind them was a dark figure. They wore several layers of black winter clothing, a jean jacket, and heavy boots. But was most concerning was the gleaming white mask covering their face and the machete gripped in their hands.

A frightened gasp escaped her lungs and darkness consumed her vision when the door shut. The figures’s boots thudded seamlessly down the stairs.

He either knew the layout or…

R was frozen in that moment. It took effort to unfreeze herself. She broke free when the figure was but a few feet away. R swerved and dashed down the hallway. Her arms followed the lining of the walls before making a right. As she grasped the side and made an immediate swerve, her knee collided with a small cardboard box and her body splayed on the ground. Her ankle throbbed, caught in the contents of the box. A weak scream whispered from her lungs - no-one but her could hear it. It was as though her fear reaction was the freeze in the moment, just like before. There was no fight or flight - only… this weakness.

She clawed back up to her feet and made sure to hold onto the wok tightly. However, when her eyes adjusted and she came to a slow, R realized she was in a dead end. There was nothing but a small side-room for expensive wines or shelves that held various holiday decorations. Nonetheless, she entered the wine room and pressed herself next to the doorway.

Her heartbeat clamored in her eardrums and it took focus as she strained with the wok at the ready. The footsteps were consistent and calculated; almost reluctant, even. And then, they halted just before the doorway. R felt her body shrink and tremble. Her eyes were wide and despite how she shivered, beads of sweat rolled down every part of her body. Her eyes felt dry while waiting for the figure to enter.

And then, they did. The mask was the first thing she could identify. Realizing a painful shriek, she swung the wok at the mask. The figure seemed caught off guard and stumbled back. The machete swung out and scraped the wok, sending it to the ground. R immediately reached for a wine bottle on the shelf next to her. The figure recovered quickly, although the groan that escaped him almost sounded filtered. R immediately threw the bottle, and the man was barely capable of blocking it with the machete. The glass shards and liquid shattered everywhere.

The man stumbled into the room, holding the machete as a makeshift shield. R did not remove her eyes from the figure as she pressed herself against the wall of bottles. She grabbed two at once, waving them in front of her.

“S - stay back,” she whimpered.

The man froze momentarily before a low, sadistic chuckle broke through and the head tilted to the side. Gloved hands angled the machete in a strange way; almost as though it was the handle he was attempting to attack her with.

A moment frozen in place occurred and R was only aware of time from each drum of her heart. R knew defense was the correct choice, and yet…

She swung one bottle at the man, but he suddenly ducked and the handle of the machete rammed into her stomach. R brought the other bottle down onto his head, but he suddenly threw R to the side. Her head rang as it hit the side of a shelf and her arms could barely push her off. She was cold, wet, and injured.

Her legs kicked out and she mustered as loud of a scream as she could. The man had suddenly straddled her waist. The machete was tossed to the side out of reach and R could barely coordinate her arms enough to paw at the selfing behind her. Her nerves were on fire and, even though a normal human might have more strength, her entire body hurt and her bones cracked with every stretch.

She trembled as one gloved hand grabbed and pinned her wrists together above her head. The other was fishing through the pockets before withdrawing a syringe. Her eyes widened and tears slid down her cheeks.

“God, please, no…! Please —!”

The syringe was suddenly stabbed skillfully into her neck. The cold liquid sent shivers down her body and R blinked. She was not moving but the world began to circle around her. Her eyelids felt heavy and although she thought of cries for help, she could not muster the strength.

The breathing of the man grew heavier and louder, almost from excitement. Her body went limp and the hand that held her wrist suddenly slid down her face and shut her eyes for her. One last sigh escaped R.

It was a similar headache like she had earlier, if not of a different caliber. R was cognizant of every sensation but could not form thoughts. It was like she was both deeply in her bones but also out of her body. She heard the rumblings of movement and arms slid underneath her. R’s body rag dolled against the figure’s back and felt every step.

She opened her eyes for but a brief moment. She was only being led further into the basement. And once she was set in an uncomfortable wooden chair, her mind went silent.

~~~

R’s eyes blinked open at the sound of two familiar voices: Ben and Josh. Her entire body ached, but when she went to stretch, she realized her body was completely restrained. Her hands and feet could wiggle, but her over arms, legs, and torso were tied to a limp wooden chair. Her eyes shot up and she gazed at the light source. Beyond a chainlink fence, were two pleading men who dangled from the ground with their wrists shackled to a wooden plyboard. R immediately released a shriek, even as her head pounded.

“R, baby, are you okay?” Ben shouted, flailing his body desperately. “Please, you gotta help us —!”

Josh was all but silent, although wide eyed and afraid. His eyes were glued to the sharp, horizontal blade that had a mechanical path to aim straight at them. And as R looked at her hands, she realized there were two buttons in reach of her fingers; each with a photo of one of the men.

“Where - what —“ R started, only for a speaker to turn on.

“Hello, and thank you for joining me.”

Screams and cries echoed in the room form all three. R struggled against her restraints, even craning her neck to try bitting the rope. Even the chair itself seemed glued to the ground and didn’t budge.

“What is this?” Josh shouted out.

“We’re going to conduct a little experiment. A test of loyalty. Now, for this experiment, we’ll need the cooperation of R. Our brave participant will decide which subject will live and which will die.”

R let out a gargled beg and tears cascaded her vision.

“Fuck! R! R, you gotta get me out of here, babe! I fucking love you! Fuck!”

Josh was quiet beside him, intense eyes glued to R in horror. “Please, oh god…”

“Please. Everyone, calm down. It’s all very simple. R, you will find two buttons directly in front of you. All you have to do… is choose who you will save!”

Before R could truly comprehend the words, the mechanical blade began to whir. R’s mouth became dry as she gaped at the horror in front of her.

“Shit, okay, okay… things will be okay,” Josh trembled, his body limp against the chains. His eyes held an intent focus on the blade that was slowly approaching both.

R let out a squeal and tried hurling out of the seat again. “Fuck, what the fuck is this!” R bellowed, fingers treating each button like the plague. “But if I…”

“R, Jesus, you know who you have to pick. Please, babe! You’re my everything! I’m sorry, Josh, but fuck! R, I’m your future! I love you! Please, I don’t want to die!”

She blinked at the man, guilty and nausea erupting in her stomach. She watched as the blade grew nearer, and it was impossible to ignore that both would die without her choosing. Her eyes switched between the two as her breaths heaved.

“I… I can’t… why…! Who, why…”

“R, l - listen to me,” Josh’s voice suddenly boomed, despite how terrified he was. “It’s… it’s not your fault, okay? Y - you can choose me if you really want to! I wouldn’t… I wouldn’t blame you if you did, okay?You don’t owe me anything…! But… I don’t…”

R blinked away tears and her eyes flew between the buttons. The blade was mere feet away from killing both.

There was no moment for logic or even feeling.

One last agonized cry escaped her lungs as she pressed a button.

The blade suddenly swerved left. Ben’s eyes widened in horror and he let out agonized roars of fear. Josh was wide eyed and could do nothing but watch.

“Me? Me? Why me, R? I… I’m sorry. No… This isn’t your —“

Pained howls escaped and the whirring was suddenly conjoined with splattered of blood. R didn’t want to, but she could not look away as she watched the blade cut and sear into Ben’s flesh.

“I - I’m sorry, Ben! I love you! I love you so much!”

Ben only watched R weakly as his lips blubbered. His lungs tore and blood coated everything around him. The screams did not last long as his torso dangled underneath him. The pleads turned into gargles and the gargles turned into silence as Ben’s head hung. And then the legs detached, collapsing to the ground.

And then, there was nothing but the ringing silence as even the blade came to a halt.

R’s head hung and her body trembled with contained sobs. She was almost dazed, completely unaware at the click of restraints from beyond the fence. Josh fell to the ground - but so did the upper half of Ben’s corpse.

And so, unless if she were to look up, she was blissfully unaware of the maddened grin that blossomed across Josh’s cheeks and how his eyes gleamed with adoration for the woman beyond the fence.

She peered up as the fence jangled. Josh’s blood-soaked body trembled as he clambered up the fence before his body dropped onto R’s side. R gasped a cried quiet apologies, not daring to stare at her boyfriend’s remains.

R felt like such an awful, evil person. But she refused to let them both die. What else could she do? Back then, could R have found a way to save at least Beth?

Her fuzzy vision was dutifully aware of how Josh nimbly untied R’s restraints. Small apologies and thanks were muttered from him - almost fondly. She gulped as her body immediately collapsed into the man in front of her when she was set free. Ben’s blood smeared across her body, but she clutched him desperately, hands trembling as warm, living arms held and comforted her in the moment.

Josh was on his knees in front of her crying and thanking her with such sincerity. R allowed her body to fall forward and she sat on the ground, allowing Josh to hush her. R’s ears rang with the cries of the dead. And now, it wasn’t just Beth or Hannah - Ben had joined the cacophony.

“R, it’s okay. There’s nothing you - you could have done,” he gasped into her ear, hands pawing and grasping at her back.

The woman sat up suddenly, eyes glossed over with despair. She grasped at the front of Josh’s shirt, and although entranced, swayed from side to side. His lips trembled as he watched, hands at her waist to keep her upright.

“Joshie, what have I done…? Who’s doing this? Where’s everyone else? I just… I just killed someone - my boyfriend —“

“No, R, please,” Josh pleaded, pawing at her face. She flinched at how wet his hands were. “You didn’t kill anyone. It’s not your fault, okay? Thank you. Thank you, R. You didn’t kill him - you saved me. I didn’t… I didn’t think you would. Please, you did the right thing, okay? You shouldn’t… you never should have been involved.”

R barely bast an eye at his strange wording, accepting his kind and gentle words. Had she made the right choice? Was there even a right choice? Ben had been her lover, yes. But she’d known Josh for four years - surely there was a sense of loyalty in that, right? But logically, shouldn’t Josh had been put out of her misery instead? Josh had lived a hard, traumatized life - and Ben had a normal, happy upbringing and adulthood —

“Listen, we have to get out of here, okay? We don’t know where that guy is or if he’s working with someone. A - and we have to get help, right?”

Josh was handling himself with a surprisingly clear mind. R recalled that when Hannah and Beth had died, he had been violent, angry, and discombobulated. He could barely speak a proper sentence and had to be drugged for his own safety. He had been suicidal, manic, and bipolar. But now… he was speaking so plainly.

It was surely the adrenaline of it all. R limply nodded, allowing Josh to wrap his arms under her armpits and stabilize her while she stood up. R was wobbly from residual drugs and leaned against Josh. She gripped his splotchy panel in her hands.R then noticed how cold it was.

A scream suddenly rang throughout the basement and both went stiff as a board. Josh was quick to wrap his arms around her protectively.

“W - we should —“

“Yeah. Come on, R, it came from that way.”

The pair stabilized one another as they both limped down the hallway. Josh seemed to be able to navigate the large basement with ease. And then, as they rounded a corner, a light activated and blasted into the room.

Matt and Emily were tied precariously - it was almost like a tug-of-rope situation: their hands were tied together and were blocked off from one another and R with glass walls. However, there was a hole that allowed the rope to go through. And strangle, it was like the ground was inverted and tilted, dipping down to the middle. The slopes also had several drains.

“Hello, Matt and Emily. It appears we have an audience.”

#yandere #x reader #x y/n #self insert #yandere x reader #yandere until dawn #until dawn #yandere josh washington #josh washington x reader #josh washington

20 notes · View notes

midnightquillz · 11 hours ago

Text

I wanted to try this again, So i think I got it down this time. :) Honestly i know this poster { @thewriteadviceforwriters was giving advice and i love it but this mentally gave me a prompt. So intentional or not i hope you see this! Thank you :)

MidnightQuillz version of: ✨ The Twist That Reframes Everything ✨

Content Warnings:

Murder and premeditated killing

Financial fraud/embezzlement

Psychological manipulation and deception

Undercover surveillance/stalking

Exploitation of grief support groups

Domestic violence (verbal arguments)

Death of a loved one

Fake grief/emotional manipulation

Police investigation themes

Betrayal of trust

Note: This story involves someone using grief counseling as a cover for criminal activity and an undercover investigation within a mental health support setting.

The Support Group

Jasmine had been going to the grief support group for three months when Alex first showed up.

The community center meeting room always smelled like burnt coffee and industrial disinfectant, but Jasmine had grown oddly fond of it. It was the only place where she didn't have to pretend she was "doing better" or "moving on" or any of the other phrases people used when they were uncomfortable with her pain.

"We have someone new joining us today," Linda, the group facilitator, announced with her usual gentle smile. "Alex, would you like to introduce yourself?"

Alex was younger than most of the group—maybe late twenties, with tired eyes and the kind of nervous energy that came from drinking too much coffee and sleeping too little. They fidgeted with the sleeves of their oversized sweater as they spoke.

"Hi, I'm Alex. I... my partner died six months ago. Car accident." Their voice was barely above a whisper. "I'm not really good at this talking thing, but my therapist said I should try."

"Thank you for sharing," Linda said. "What would you like us to know about your partner?"

Alex's face softened. "Their name was Jordan. They were... they were everything good about the world, you know? Always making everyone laugh, always trying to help people. They worked at the animal shelter downtown because they said someone had to speak for the ones who couldn't speak for themselves."

Jasmine felt the familiar ache in her chest. It had been eight months since Marcus died—also a car accident, though his had been at night, in the rain, on his way home from working late at the youth center. She'd heard Alex's story a hundred times in different versions from different people, but it never got easier.

After the meeting, Jasmine found herself walking out with Alex. It wasn't intentional—they just happened to be heading in the same direction.

"How do you do it?" Alex asked suddenly. "Linda said you've been coming for months. Does it get easier?"

Jasmine considered lying, giving the answer people wanted to hear. Instead, she said, "Some days are better than others. Some days I still wake up and forget he's gone."

"Jordan used to leave me little notes," Alex said. "Stupid things, like reminders to eat lunch or jokes they found online. I keep finding them in random places—jacket pockets, between book pages. It's like they're still trying to take care of me."

"Marcus did that too," Jasmine said, surprised. "He'd put Post-it notes on the bathroom mirror with terrible puns. I couldn't bring myself to take them down for months."

They walked in comfortable silence for a while. Then Alex said, "Would you maybe want to get coffee sometime? Not like a date or anything, just... it might be nice to talk to someone who gets it."

Jasmine hesitated. She hadn't really talked to anyone outside the group since Marcus died. Her friends and family meant well, but they all seemed to think grief had an expiration date.

"I know a place," she said finally. "The café on Pine Street. They have terrible coffee but good pastries."

Alex smiled—the first genuine smile Jasmine had seen from them. "Perfect. I love terrible coffee."

Over the next few weeks, Jasmine and Alex fell into an easy friendship. They met for coffee after group meetings, texted each other on bad days, and slowly began to share the weight of their grief.

Alex was funny in a dark, self-deprecating way that made Jasmine laugh despite herself. They had strong opinions about movies, knew an alarming amount about obscure true crime cases, and always ordered the same thing at the café—black coffee and a blueberry muffin they never finished.

"Jordan would have loved you," Alex said one afternoon, stirring sugar into their coffee. "They collected people like you."

"People like me?"

"Good people. Genuine people. They had this theory that the world was full of people pretending to be okay, and the only way to survive was to find the ones who admitted they weren't."

Jasmine thought about Marcus, about how he'd had a similar philosophy. "What did Jordan do at the animal shelter?"

"They were a veterinary technician. Worked mostly with the dogs nobody wanted—the old ones, the sick ones, the ones with behavioral issues. Jordan said they just needed someone to be patient with them."

"That sounds like Marcus. He worked with teenagers everyone else had given up on."

Alex nodded. "Do you think they would have been friends? Jordan and Marcus?"

"Definitely," Jasmine said. "Marcus would have loved Jordan's Post-it note thing. He was always trying to make people smile."

"What's the worst thing about it?" Alex asked suddenly. "The grief, I mean."

Jasmine considered. "People expect you to be grateful for the time you had. Like the pain is worth it because you got to love someone. But some days I think I'd rather have never met him than feel like this."

"Yeah," Alex said quietly. "And then you feel guilty for thinking that."

"Exactly."

They sat in comfortable silence, watching the rain streak down the café windows. Outside, people hurried past with umbrellas and determined expressions, everyone rushing somewhere important. Jasmine wondered if any of them were carrying the kind of weight she and Alex carried.

"Can I ask you something?" Alex said. "Do you ever feel like... like you're betraying them by moving forward? Like enjoying anything is proof you didn't love them enough?"

"All the time," Jasmine admitted. "I laughed at something on TV last week and immediately felt sick about it. Like I was supposed to be sad forever to prove he mattered."

"Jordan would hate that," Alex said. "They'd probably leave me a note telling me to stop being an idiot and go live my life."

"Marcus would say the same thing. He was always pushing people to be better than they thought they could be."

Alex smiled, but it didn't reach their eyes. "Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I'd been in the car with them that night."

"Alex..."

"Not in a suicidal way," Alex said quickly. "I mean, maybe sometimes. But mostly I just wonder if I could have changed something. If I'd been there, maybe I could have grabbed the wheel, or told them to slow down, or..."

"Or you'd both be dead," Jasmine said gently. "I've had the same thoughts about Marcus. What if I'd convinced him to stay home that night? What if I'd picked him up instead of letting him drive? But you can't live in the what-ifs."

"I know. Jordan's mom tells me the same thing. She says Jordan wouldn't want me to blame myself."

"You're close with Jordan's family?"

"They're all I have left of Jordan, you know? Jordan's mom still texts me every week to check in. Their dad sends me pictures of their dog. It's like... they're keeping me connected to the person I was when Jordan was alive."

Jasmine felt a pang of envy. Marcus's family had been kind but distant after the funeral. They'd never really approved of their relationship, and his death had only made things more awkward.

"That's beautiful," she said. "I'm glad you have that."

"What about you? Do you have anyone who knew Marcus well?"

"A few friends from work, but they don't really know what to say anymore. Everyone's moved on except me."

Alex reached across the table and squeezed her hand. "I'm not moving on either. We can not move on together."

The following week, Alex didn't show up to group. Jasmine waited until the last minute, thinking maybe they were just running late, but Linda started the session without them.

"Is Alex okay?" Jasmine asked Linda after the meeting.

"I'm sure they're fine," Linda said. "People sometimes need breaks from group. The work we do here can be overwhelming."

Jasmine texted Alex that night: Missed you at group today. Everything okay?

No response.

She tried again the next day, and the day after that. By the weekend, she was genuinely worried. It wasn't like Alex to disappear without saying anything.

On Monday, she decided to stop by the animal shelter where Jordan had worked. Maybe someone there would know how to reach Alex, or at least confirm that they were okay.

The shelter was a small, cheerful building with murals of dogs and cats painted on the outside walls. Inside, the smell of disinfectant couldn't quite mask the underlying scent of animals and hope.

"Excuse me," Jasmine said to the young woman at the front desk. "I'm looking for information about someone who used to work here. Jordan?"

The woman looked confused. "Jordan? I'm sorry, what's their last name?"

"I... I don't actually know. They worked here as a vet tech. They died about six months ago in a car accident?"

The woman's expression grew more puzzled. "I'm sorry, but I don't think anyone named Jordan has worked here. I've been here for two years, and before that my supervisor would have mentioned anyone who... who died. Can you describe them?"

Jasmine realized she couldn't. Alex had talked about Jordan constantly but had never shown her a picture, never described what they looked like beyond vague terms like "beautiful" and "kind."

"Maybe I have the wrong shelter," she said weakly.

"Maybe. You could try the city shelter on Broadway, or the one in Queen Anne."

Jasmine thanked her and left, but she didn't go to the other shelters. Instead, she sat in her car in the parking lot, trying to make sense of what she'd just learned.

That evening, she googled "car accident Jordan Seattle six months ago" and found nothing. She tried different variations—Jordan, car accident, vet tech, animal shelter—but came up empty.

Her phone buzzed. A text from Alex: Sorry I missed group. Been having a rough week. Coffee tomorrow?

Jasmine stared at the message for a long time before responding: Sure. Pine Street café at 2?

Perfect. See you then.

Alex looked terrible when they showed up to the café the next day. Their eyes were red-rimmed, and they kept glancing around nervously.

"Are you okay?" Jasmine asked. "You look like you haven't slept."

"I haven't been sleeping well," Alex admitted. "Bad dreams."

"About Jordan?"

Alex's face went very still. "Why would you ask that?"

"Because... because that's what we talk about. Our partners. Our grief."

"Right. Yes. About Jordan."

They ordered their usual—black coffee and a blueberry muffin—but Alex's hands were shaking slightly as they stirred sugar into their cup.

"Alex, I need to ask you something," Jasmine said carefully. "I went to the animal shelter yesterday. The one where Jordan worked."

Alex went very pale. "Why?"

"Because I was worried about you. You disappeared without saying anything, and I thought maybe someone there could help me figure out if you were okay."

"And?"

"They said no one named Jordan had ever worked there."

Alex was quiet for a long moment. Then they said, "Maybe I got the name wrong. Maybe it was a different shelter."

"Alex."

"Or maybe they just didn't know. Big staff turnover, you know?"

"Alex, stop."

Alex looked up at her, and Jasmine saw something in their eyes that made her stomach drop. Fear. Guilt. And something else—something that looked almost like relief.

"There is no Jordan, is there?" Jasmine said quietly.

Alex's face crumpled. "I can explain."

"I don't understand. Why would you lie about something like that?"

"Because I needed to," Alex said, tears starting to fall. "Because I needed to understand."

"Understand what?"

Alex wiped their eyes with their sleeve. "How you did it. How you got away with it."

"Got away with what?"

"Killing Marcus."

The words hit Jasmine like a physical blow. "What?"

"I know it was you," Alex said, their voice suddenly steady. "I know you killed him, and I know you've been lying about it for eight months."

Jasmine felt the world tilt around her. "Alex, what are you talking about? Marcus died in a car accident. You know that. Everyone knows that."

"Marcus Chen died in a single-car accident on Highway 99 at 11:47 PM on a rainy Tuesday night," Alex said, and their voice was different now—clinical, precise. "He was driving home from work when his car hydroplaned and hit a tree. No other vehicles involved. No witnesses."

"How do you know his last name?" Jasmine whispered.

"Because I've been investigating his death for eight months. Because Marcus Chen was my brother."

The café suddenly felt very small and very quiet. Jasmine could hear her own heartbeat in her ears.

"Your brother," she repeated.

"My older brother. Marcus Alexander Chen. He called me Alex when we were kids because he said my real name was too long. Alexandra." Alex's eyes were hard now, all pretense of grief gone. "He was driving home from the youth center where he volunteered, just like he did every Tuesday night. Except that Tuesday, he'd been fighting with his girlfriend. You."

"We didn't fight—"

"You did. The neighbors heard you screaming at each other. Something about money, about him finding out what you'd been doing." Alex leaned forward. "Want to know what I think happened?"

Jasmine wanted to run, to scream, to deny everything, but she was frozen in place.

"I think you'd been stealing from the youth center's fundraising account. Marcus was treasurer, so he would have noticed eventually. I think he confronted you, and you fought, and you knew your comfortable little life was about to fall apart." Alex's voice was getting louder. "So you followed him when he left. You waited until he was on that dark stretch of highway, and you ran him off the road."

"That's insane. You're insane."

"Am I? Because I've been watching you for months, Jasmine. I've been to your apartment, I've followed you to work, I've sat in group therapy sessions listening to you perform grief for a man you murdered." Alex pulled out their phone. "I've been recording everything."

Jasmine's blood turned to ice. "Recording what?"

"Every conversation. Every coffee date. Every time you slipped up and said something that didn't match the story you told the police." Alex scrolled through their phone. "Like how you said Marcus left you Post-it notes on the bathroom mirror, but you told the investigating officer you'd removed all his things from the apartment the week after he died. Or how you said he was working late that night, but the youth center's records show he left at his normal time."

"You're twisting things—"

"Or how you knew exactly how much money was missing from the fundraising account even though that information was never made public."

Jasmine felt like she was drowning. "I never said anything about money."

"Two weeks ago. You said Marcus was always worried about money, that he'd been stressed about some accounting discrepancy at work. But the only people who knew about the missing money were Marcus, the center's director, and the police."

Alex leaned back in their chair, and for the first time since Jasmine had known them, they looked genuinely calm.

"I've been building a case against you for eight months," Alex said. "The fake grief support group attendance, the manufactured friendship, the recorded conversations—it's all evidence. And tomorrow morning, I'm taking it all to the police."

Jasmine's hands were shaking now. "You can't prove anything."

"Actually, I can. See, while I was playing your grieving friend, I was also tracking your financial records. Turns out you made some interesting deposits right after Marcus died. Insurance money, sure, but also payments from some offshore accounts that are very hard to trace."

"You're crazy."

"And you're a murderer who's been using a grief support group as cover for your guilt." Alex stood up. "The really sick part is that you actually seemed to enjoy it. Playing the grieving girlfriend, getting sympathy, making friends with other people who were actually in pain."

Jasmine thought about all their conversations, all the times she'd felt genuinely connected to Alex, all the moments when sharing her "grief" had felt almost real.

"I did love him," she said quietly.

"No, you didn't. You loved what he could give you. And when he threatened to take that away, you killed him."

Alex gathered their things. "Oh, and Jasmine? That story about Jordan? I got it from you. Every detail about the Post-it notes, the animal shelter, the caring nature—that was all Marcus. I just changed the name and made up a car accident. Funny how easy it was to get you to tell me exactly how to fake grief when you'd been doing it for months."

They paused at the door. "The police will be in touch soon. I'd suggest you get a lawyer."

And then Alex was gone, leaving Jasmine alone with her cold coffee and the terrible understanding that everything she thought she knew about the last three months had been a lie.

Her phone buzzed. A text from an unknown number: Thanks for the confession. - Detective Chen

Detective Chen. Marcus's sister. Alexandra Chen, who'd been patient and kind and understanding while she built an airtight case against the woman who'd killed her brother.

Jasmine looked around the café, at the other customers drinking their coffee and living their normal lives, and realized she was probably looking at it for the last time as a free woman.

Outside, it started to rain.

🔪 3 Plot Twists That Slap (and 1 that should be arrested) 🔪

hello and welcome back to me yelling on main about storytelling crimes. today we are talking about plot twists. specifically: the good, the god-tier, and the why-would-you-do-this-i-trusted-you tier.

let’s go.

✨ The Twist That Reframes Everything ✨ a.k.a. the “wait. WAIT.” twist. This is when you drop a twist that doesn’t just add drama - it recontextualizes the entire story. It makes the reader go back and reread earlier scenes like “was this character ALWAYS sketchy or am I just stupid??” It retroactively changes the emotional weight of everything that’s happened. Suddenly that offhanded comment in chapter three hits like a brick. The romance subplot becomes 500% more tragic. The villain’s motive makes SENSE now. Delicious.

✅ Best used when: the breadcrumbs are subtle but real. The twist shouldn’t come out of nowhere - it should feel inevitable in hindsight. Like Sixth Sense, Knives Out, that one betrayal in your favorite anime you still haven’t recovered from.

2.🧨 The Emotional Betrayal It’s giving: “i would’ve died for you” energy. This is the kind of twist that hurts. You thought they were loyal. You thought they cared. They did care - and still did it anyway. Or they never cared, and now you’re spiraling. This twist slaps because it’s not just about plot, it’s about trust. It stabs the characters AND the reader in the same motion. Bonus points if it’s a slow burn betrayal. Bonus bonus points if the betrayer feels genuinely torn up about it.

✅ Best used when: the reader is emotionally attached. Don’t waste this one on a side character we barely know. Save it for the love interest. The best friend. The mentor figure with dad energy. Make it personal. Make it RUIN lives.

3. 🧊 The “They Were Dead the Whole Time” but Make It Interesting Listen. This one’s risky. It’s a classic for a reason but also easy to flop. But when done well? Haunting. Creepy. Unhinged in a gorgeous way. It doesn’t have to be death either - maybe the character’s been possessed. Or they’re not real. Or the narrator’s memory is lying. The KEY is to not lean too hard on the shock. Lean on the vibes. Give it eeriness. Make it a slow unraveling. Give us dread. Give us melancholy. Give us psychological decay with a side of unreliable narrator.

✅ Best used when: you’re writing something surreal, gothic, speculative, or emotionally weird. This twist isn’t about plot logic, it’s about atmosphere and emotional rot.

🚨 The Twist That Should Be Arrested: “It Was All a Dream” 🚨 I’m sorry but. no. if I read 80k words of someone’s descent into madness just to find out it was their stress dream and now they’re normal again?? I will throw the entire book into a lake. This twist erases tension instead of escalating it. It invalidates everything the reader emotionally invested in. It’s the narrative equivalent of gaslighting. don’t do it. UNLESS - and this is a big unless - you’re doing it with INTENT. Meta intent. Dream-within-a-dream psychological horror intent. If you’re gonna do it, it better haunt me. It better RUIN me. Otherwise? Into the lake.

okay that’s all. go forth and commit plot crimes responsibly. bonus points if you use all three Good Twists in the same story and then look me in the eye like “oh was that too much?”

it wasn’t.

tag me when you emotionally destroy someone with it.

🕯️ download the pack & write something cursed:

373 notes · View notes

crazysandwich · 2 days ago

Text

Tony Stark’s Legacy Isn’t Up for Debate

Okay, I need to talk about Tony Stark because I need to get this off my chest. Fair warning, this might be a bit controversial.

Disclaimer: I haven’t watched Ironheart yet, and I know I’m reacting to a single line taken out of context. Also, no spoilers in this post aside from that one line I’ll be talking about. So if you haven’t seen Ironheart yet either, don’t worry. I’m not going into anything else from the show. But these are just the thoughts that came to me after hearing it. I’ve seen a lot of clips on TikTok around the line, “Do you think Tony Stark would be Tony Stark if he wasn’t a billionaire?” and honestly, my issue here is mostly with the writing. Not with Ironheart as a character. Again, I haven’t seen the full series so I’m not judging her. But this isn’t the first time I’ve noticed this pattern.

There are a lot of great characters in the MCU with so much potential for good storytelling. But can we stop diminishing the impact that the original characters had? Specifically, Tony Stark, in this case. Let’s be real. He was a big deal. Huge. And we shouldn’t forget that. Move forward, yes. Create new stories, yes. But don’t erase what came before.

Lately, it feels like some writers are trying to push Tony into the background or treat him like a secondary figure. That just doesn’t sit right with me. You can’t rewrite the fact that he had one of the most significant character arcs in the MCU. Fans remember his story, his growth, his sacrifices, every iconic line.

And let’s not forget, Tony Stark’s entire arc was about proving he was more than just a billionaire. Yes, that was part of his identity, but it wasn’t the full story. Over ten years and multiple films, he showed again and again that he was willing to put others before himself, that he could grow, take responsibility, and make real sacrifices. That was the core of his character growth. From a self-centered weapons manufacturer to someone who snapped his fingers to save the universe. He didn’t just coast on his wealth. He evolved. That’s why people connected with him. That’s why it hurts to see that reduced to just "billionaire" as if that was all he ever was.

We literally turned “Tony Stark was able to build this in a cave! With a box of scraps!” into a cult quote. It was so iconic that it even got referenced again in a Spider-Man movie. Did the writers, producers, or anyone at Marvel forget how big of an impact that had? Why are they trying to downplay him now? It comes off as disrespectful.

Again, no hate to Ironheart. I’m excited to watch the series, and I’ll go in with an open mind. But this weird energy around dismissing Tony Stark needs to stop.

It’s not even just this show. I remember The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (which I loved, by the way, one of my favorites), and there was that part early on where it’s revealed the Avengers weren’t on a traditional salary, despite Tony’s financial support. And I get it, it’s part of the plot, but come on. He literally funded their headquarters, tech, suits, operations, and probably their living expenses too. The man gave them two whole buildings. What more was he supposed to do, run payroll on top of all that?

Yes, a formal salary would have been nice, but let’s not act like he left everyone high and dry. It feels like the writers are using him as an easy target lately, and I don’t get it.

Anyway, this turned into a full-on rant, haha. I just had to share these thoughts. Not sure if anyone else feels the same. Once again, no hate to Ironheart, I believe she has a lot of potential, and I have high hopes for the series. Just please stop disrespecting the OGs. If you want to create better and newer characters, do it. But don’t erase the ones who built the foundation.

#mcu #marvel #tony stark #ironheart #iron man #falcon and the winter soldier #just my thoughts #just my opinion #ramblings #rant post #og avengers #no hate to ironheart #not a spoiler #tony stark appreciation #stop erasing tony #tony stark defense squad

19 notes · View notes

givelightningherharem · 7 months ago

Text

IN CASE YOU GUYS DIDNT KNOW, THERE IS GOING TO BE A SPECIAL MUSIC LIVESTREAM HELD FOR FINAL FANTASY XIII’S ANNIVERSARY!!! IT WOULD BE GREAT TO ALL GO AND SHOW SOME SUPPORT WHILE ALSO VIBE TO SOME OF FFXIII’S BEAUTIFUL SOUNDTRACK!!!!

LINK TO THE STREAM!! NOTE THAT IT WILL BE UNARCHIVED SO IF YOU MISS IT YOU WONT BE ABLE TO SEE IT AGAIN UNLESS THEY MAYBE DECIDE TO REBROADCAST IT!!

#it’s probably only going to be just that aka a music livestream but #recognition is still something!!!#it would be nice to all show some support!!#ffxiii #ff13 #lightning farron #final fantasy xiii #final fantasy 13

73 notes · View notes

rocketeeeers · 2 days ago

Text

hii! this is such a sweet concept, thank you so much for coming up with it! 🩷 i'm so sorry you're going through stuff. you're not alone & your f/os love you lots! take care :D also i apologise if i'm doing anything wrong in this ask game, i'm new to tumblr (i mainly use twitter, though it's really nice here!) please correct me if so!

i'll be answering the qns with my 2 main f/o's (hikage toma prri & kobayashi kenya bokumachi), hope that's okay!

tw: mention of sh for the 1st qn

🌻 since i'm clumsy and have the tendency to sh (though i'm on the road to recovery! yay!), i tend to get injured quite often.

for toma, he normally panics when he sees the wounds and he gets really worried! he'll ask a bunch of questions on how it happened (though if it's something sh related he'd probably avoid asking since it might make me upset) while digging through his bag for his emergency supplies. he'll also probably give me some cute, colourful band-aids to distract me from the wound! for the days after, he'll take really good care of me, helping me to apply ointments and creams every day.

for kenya, he'll mask his worry behind a calm expression in order to prevent me from panicking along with him. similar to toma, he'd also grab his emergency supplies (minus the colourful band-aids). for the days after, though he's really busy, he'd make sure to send reminders via text for me to take care of my injuries.

🪷 when i'm insecure, i usually try to bottle it up, but toma can see through me really easily. he'll give me a hug and comfort me with words, reassuring me of my skills and my good qualities, telling me he loves me no matter what and that the things my head is telling me are all untrue.

for kenya, since we've known each other for quite a while, he can also see through me easily. he's less touchy, but if i asked for a hug or anything, he'd do just that. he mainly uses his words, restating all of our past experiences that disprove my insecurities, show me that he cares, that i'm worth being cared for.

🍄 i would likely shut them down when they suggest pampering me, but both of them would insist, saying that they love me and want to take care of me.

for toma, he'd plan the whole thing himself. he'd probably bring me on a drive, stopping at all my favourite places for food or shopping. he'd do everything he possibly could to comfort me, and it would work!

for kenya, he'd ask if there's anything he could do to help, but since i don't normally know the answer to that, he'd end up taking things into his own hands and planning everything out. he'd take me out on weekends and treat me to some good food, and then maybe we would go home and relax.

☀️ toma would probably get something cute and simple, but full of thought, like jewelry in the style i like, or a plush that reminds him of me or me of him! kenya would probably get something on my wishlist (which tends to be cute stuff too)

📚 to be honest, we do all of that, heheh... i'm quite a needy person!

💜 oh there's too many... these past few days i've been feeling like crap, and sometimes my only reason for holding on is them. i don't wanna go into detail because honestly? i've been blocking most of my emotions out and i don't recall it, and i feel that if i tried i might get more upset. but they helped a lot. when it feels like nobody cares for me, i have them. when it feels like i'm alone, i have them. they've helped me with so so much and i cannot express how grateful i am for them coming into my life.

🥞 my kindness and my loyalty/dedication, i believe. i'd do so much for them, and just them. i'd try my best to be with them whenever they need and more, supporting them through the littlest actions.

🍁 toma sings me songs with that warm voice of his. it's always comforting. we'd cuddle too.

kenya talks to me and either cuddles or holds my hand until i fall asleep.

💫 toma would motivate me with little things like kisses or gifts and then tell me he was so proud of me after i checked a task off. if a task required a lot of work, he'd do it together with me and we would sing some songs while doing it to get my mind off of it.

kenya would send constant reminders to me, even when at work. he'd set alarms to remind me to drink water and stuff. he'd also praise me lots when i do something, and he'd help out where he can.

🍀 toma holds my hand, giving me a physical sensation that i can focus all my attention on. he'll pass me my earplugs/earphones and find a way out of that situation as fast as possible.

kenya, well, i hc him to also easily get overwhelmed. he'd probably try to get over it so that he can calm me, but i wouldn't ever let him force himself to calm down, so we'd probably just be overwhelmed together and find a way to leave the situation together. once out, we'll just spend time in each other's company until we feel better.

again, thank you so much for making this. it was really fun to answer! i'm sorry my answers got so long 😅

🪻comfort and care f/o ask game🪻

hi there! thank you so much to those of you who participated in my last f/o ask game ⸜(*ˊᗜˋ*)⸝ i had so much fun making it and i'm glad to see others are enjoying it too! i decided to make another (very self indulgent) f/o ask game since i've been going through a pretty rough patch lately and i want my f/os to take care of me (߹𖥦߹) these asks will be mental health centric (and can be quite personal), so if that's not your cup of tea, feel free to scroll past! if anyone else has been struggling as well, please remember you are so incredibly loved and wanted here! especially by your f/os! take care of yourselves ♡

so sorry for the long intro! we'll get into it now. as always, proship please do not interact!

also, this ask game is platonic/familial friendly! not just aimed towards romantic f/os! ٩(ˊᗜˋ )و

🌻 how does your f/o take care of you and/or react if you're injured? any injury applies. it could be as simple as bumping into the corner of a table and bruising your hip, or maybe something as severe as coming back wounded from an intense battle.

🪷 how does your f/o comfort you when you're feeling insecure/self conscious? if they prefer to comfort using words, what do they say? if they use actions, what do they do?

🍄 your f/o notices you're stressed/unhappy/not doing well and insists that they want to pamper you. what would that look like? do they do or say anything specific that only they would do? do they want you to tell them what you want, or do they plan the pamper session themself?

☀️ your f/o surprises you with a gift after noticing how hard you've been working lately, and they need to express how proud of you they are. what's the gift?

📚 what is your f/os love language? do they incorporate their love language into how they support you? (the main 5 love languages are; words of affirmation, acts of service, gift giving, quality time, and physical touch. though if you and your f/o have your own love language, please feel free to use that instead!)

💜 name a time (or multiple) when your f/o was your unwavering rock and solace. only if you're comfortable with sharing, what were you going through? how did your f/o support you?

🥞 what does your f/o admire about you? it can go beyond physical traits!

🍁 how does your f/o help you when you can't sleep/can't stay asleep?

💫 how does your f/o help and/or support you when you're struggling with taking care of yourself? (e.g. messy room, forgetting to take meds, etc.)

🍀 what does your f/o do when you're in an overstimulating/overwhelming situation? (e.g. in a large crowd, around loud noises, etc.) do they have any techniques to soothe you?

#yumeshipping #yumeship #self ship #self shipping #f/o community #f/o promo #f/o

79 notes · View notes